I know I haven’t blogged the last couple of months
But today seems an appropriate day to say- Happy Birthday to the one who inspired this all to begin with. I miss you. I miss us.
A submissive should:
Say Please and Thank-you. Spell it out, if you’re speaking in text then abbreviations won’t do. If you’re speaking in person, annunciate your words. Always add onto your thank-you. While “Thank-you Mistress Maria”, “Please Mistress Maria?” are lovely ways of saying please and thank-you, try adding on exactly what you are asking or thanking for. “Please may I touch my clit Mistress Maria?”. It never gets old to a Domme hearing good manners from a submissive.
Sometimes you should always use your P’s & Q’s:
- When you’re asking for something (Please)
- When something has been given to you (Thank-you)
- At the end of a session (Thank-you)[A well timed thank-you can leave you both feeling cherished, especially if the session hasn’t left both of you satisfied, we all know which one is not]
Use the correct name always. It’s something you should learn early. And it will differ depending on the situation. Let me help clarify it for you. Different Domme’s will prefer to be called by different names. Mistress, Miss, Goddess, Princess, Milady, Baby etc etc etc. Some prefer the use of their first name. Some prefer a mix. (I prefer Mistress Katie). If in doubt, ask. Depending on the situation you might use different names at different times- eg, death of beloved cat- Maria, plugged tied and bound- Mistress Maria. If in doubt, ask- OR go with the safest option always “Mistress Maria”. Sometimes the lines are blurred. But don’t expect to get what you want until you address your Domme appropriately.
Be appropriately concerned about her fulfilment but do not dwell on it. Satisfaction is not solely based on the number of orgasms each partner achieves in one “scene”. My fulfilment comes from a mental satisfaction sometimes moreso than a physical one. But orgasms are good too- make sure you help with those if needed.
Domme/sub Drop. It’s a thing. Read about it.
Be prepared to express your own wants and desires, while also being flexible to hers. Just because you like disinfectant wipes, doesn’t mean she will. That doesn’t make either of you bad people, or bad Domme/sub’s- it just means you won’t enjoy that together. I’m sure there’s plenty of other things you both WILL enjoy. And if you don’t, no love lost- just wipe yourself down once finished, rinse and repeat.
Nobody is perfect, nobody knows it all. I am no expert, and neither are you. We are all continually learning and evolving. Try to be as honest as you can, take the opportunity to talk about what you did and did not enjoy in a “scene”- you might be surprised, sometimes we get caught up so much thinking about what the other person “wants” that we forget to ask them about it. Happy kinking.
KatieMichaels is taking a break. Thanks for your patience.
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While doing my hair she said: “Tonight I will lotion you up and then you can tie me up.”
Sounds good to me!
Shoe shopping in Manhattan with two people I’m comfortable with clothed or naked?
(She’s boot shopping. I’m trying not to be too...